Life In Limbo...

Song of Reference: All Falls Down- Kanye West

I've deleted and deactivated:

People, places, things, and most importantly my personal social media accounts. I was addicted to social media and it was poisoning how I viewed myself and my success. However, being the stubborn person that I am,  I continued to have faith that my reality could still coexist with my virtual fantasy. I tried everything from meditation and self care to drinking myself drunk most evenings. Nothing seemed to douse that fire that burned inside of me, that voice that kept screaming, " You have ruined your life and your worth has been diminished". I read a quote that reads, "Whatever it is standing in the way of becoming who you want to be, eliminate it". So I eliminated my virtual life, the very thing that was contorting my self-worth and creating someone within me that was so foreign. I felt like my insides were just completely burned, battered and bruised, but they were the type of wounds you can’t put a bandage over; but instead the kind that you must completely heal and renew.  I decided that I needed to start facing my reality and living my truths, rebuilding what I felt I destroyed.

I am recovering from being defeated and depressed, feeling as though I am living in limbo, not damned enough to go to hell nor blessed enough for heaven. 2017 has truly been a year of personal triumph. I've heard no, more than I've heard yes and I've experienced heartbreak in many forms including love. My deepest desires and dreams have been ripped away from me in a moment, and I feel as though doors have just kept on slamming in my face while I watch them fly open for others. It's been easy to become discouraged and hard to be inspired. I've found myself becoming complacent with where I am in life because I felt like it was where I deserved to be. But, through it all, I am here, I am present, and coming for EVERYTHING that i am destined to be.

Have you ever felt like you were living in limbo?

Drop a comment below...

~XOXO Lyric